Now comes the scary part to me….transitioning to actual food. Today I can have soft foods that don’t require a knife to cut. So tonight I am making lasagna for a mommy blog I have to write. I won’t be eating the pasta, just the meat/cheese part. So I’m anxious to see how this goes.
I lost 20 pounds the first two weeks. I lost 5 the last two weeks. But I know I need to be at the gym to help the weight loss. I gave myself last week off to deal with the muscle tear. That feels so much better now so I’m ready.
I was really wanting coffee yesterday. I miss my 4 shots of espresso, nonfat milk with sugarfree vanilla and fat free whip. But I went to Starbucks and got a tall decaf, nonfat vanilla latte. Two sips. That is all I could do before I threw it away. It was way too bitter!! So my coffee addiction maybe over. I haven’t had it for 6 weeks, so I guess that’s something.
I am not sleeping the best so I am going to go back on Ambien. My doctor said post surgery I couldn’t do the Ambien CR anymore, and better just do the old fashioned Ambien. Whatever. I just want to sleep.
I am wearing a station fleece I bought pre surgery, that is now baggy on me. I’m ok with that. I am shedding a lot of hair. But I got a ton of hair so that isn’t a huge deal. Clothes fit better. I feel better. It’s a good place to be.
People can’t believe that I haven’t had a Christmas cookie or treat. They don’t get that the thought of sugar really makes my stomach turn. And in my life I’ve eaten my share of cookies. And probably the next person’s too. I get a lot of ‘it must suck to not get the Christmas goodies’ or ‘what an awful time of year to go thru gastric sleeve!’ Um…no. Those goodies got me here. I have so much pride when I walk past a bowl of Christmas chocolates and don’t even have one. Last year those Dove chocolates where my kryptonite! I couldn’t get enough!! This year is different.
I’m nervous about eating and food getting stuck. I’m not taking huge amounts obviously, still my 2 oz, three times a day. But it’s time to take the next step. I should be able to do a meatball and three green beans. That is the example the nutritionist gave me.
And my family has been so incredible!! My daughter is constantly asking me ‘have you had enough?’ As soon as I have I give her my dish/bowl to get it out of my way. I don’t want the temptation to keep eating out of habit. So she takes it away or finishes it for me. (She’s six and really a garbage disposal) And super skinny. She gets why I’m making the changes. Sometimes I’ll say ‘Oh I wish I could have…..’ and she stops me and says ‘well, you can’t so move on.’ LOL
How is everyone else doing?