I’m finally back at work

I have been out sick from work from over a week. Today is my first day back and I’m still weak. But I’m alive. I got hit with Influenza, that turned to pneumonia. I have never felt so sick in my life.

I will never underestimate the power of either of these illnesses to bring a person to their knees. I lost 12 pounds in one week. I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t get enough fluids. Forget protein goals. I was trying to get water in my system! On Monday I ended up in the hospital for IV fluids and a vitamin pack to get my system to function. I am finally eating food and drinking water on a more regular basis. But I never want to feel like that again.

So my eating is totally off for the moment. But I am wearing a shirt that hasn’t fit for like 6 years. And many people today have said I’m wasting away. I feel like it after being so sick.



I got nailed with it. On day three. Haven’t had anything but water and chicken broth. Everything aches. Every time I cough it feels like my head is splitting open. I tried to make sugar free jello to drink and sooth my throat, one sip and it was too sweet. Thought I was going to vomit.

im trying to just keep fluids in me. This is the worst I’ve ever felt. Surgery was a breeze compared to this!

Cross your fingers my temp comes down and I can rest!

I think I did well for my girl’s retreat weekend!

So first of all, I haven’t seen a lot of movement in my scale this month, although I am fitting in clothes better. I’ve seen little ups and downs of 1-3 pounds. I decided I’m only weighing myself on Mondays. And I was afraid I might be on an up swing after the weekend, but I was down a pound. So I’m calling it a win.

I worked out twice last week. I brought my clothes for today to hit the gym. If I had extra $$ I would get a trainer to train me once a week. But that is a luxury I don’t have right now. So I will find some workout things on the web to help me. Move 30 minutes every day…that is my goal.

Anyhow…my weekend. I went to a friend’s house, about an hour away, to spend the weekend with some other ladies doing scrapbooking. I’m trying to scrapbook all the bands I’ve met, and of course my daughter. I am so many years behind, I can’t even explain it. But we laugh, eat too much and drink a lot of wine. Usually. This was my first time since surgery. So I drove up Friday night and left Sunday morning. I brought a lot of my ‘healthier food’ so I had options that I could use.

Friday night we had a great tomato based soup that was delicious and pretty healthy. I didn’t have the biscuits that were served, but the soup was plenty. I did have like 1/4 glass of wine that I sipped over the course of 3 hours. So I never felt any effects as I was also drinking water. I didn’t have any popcorn or anything either. It was a lot of fun.

The next morning our hostess served caramel and cinnamon rolls, and an egg/sausage/cheese casserole with fresh fruit. I had a strawberry, some blueberries and a sliver of the casserole with salsa. I hot some hot tea and felt like I was still doing great. The girls had mimosas for a good chunk of the day, but I didn’t. There were a lot of chips, and m&m’s, etc to snack on and I avoided them all. I did have a pita chip with some hummus because I wanted to try it. For lunch we had Papa Murphy’s Delite pizzas, so I had one slice of the veggie pizza. The crust is very thin on these, and I only had 1. I might have had a little too much with that slice as I was feeling uncomfortable. That night they made lasagna, and our hostess again went out of her way to make something better for me. She made a little dish with the sauce, meat and cheese. So I had noodle-free lasagna.  That night we sampled some cupcakes. I had 1/4 of a cupcake, if even. (I’m guessing as I had just a little sliver of each of the 4 kinds to taste)

And then I went home Sunday morning and was back in my comfort zone. I feel like I did really good! I had two packages from Lane Bryant waiting for me when I arrived home and I was very excited as they were new boots I bought myself! The knee high boots that were for wide feet and wide calves. Lo and behold my calves are still too big to make them work. I  have fat fat calves (let’s call them cows) and I don’t know if losing weight will ever effect them. So looks like I need to return the boots. Which makes me so sad!!

Anyone got any great slimming calves exercises for me?

Two days in a row!

I hit the gym two days in a row and I’m so proud of myself! I did something new too! I saw a spin class start to get ready and I asked the instructor what level it was. She said it was for any level and I could go at my own pace. I asked how long the class was, and she replied 45 minutes. I told her there is NO way I could do 45 minutes, and she said if I wanted to do 10, and walk away it was fine. She said I should try something new. So I did. I lasted about 11 minutes, but I did it. My butt is so damn sore though!

I am getting more and more compliments every day. Even though my scale went up a few pounds, it’s ok. People see big changes in me. I feel it too. I am getting my confidence back. I bought some new lipgloss too!

Ok…I  have to put in my new song to get pumped up too.

Today is for me

We have been having issues with our 6 year old in school. She can be a little toad and misbehaves on occasion. So I thought I would use the gym incentive for her to be better behaved. If she had a good day at school, then I would take her to the kids gym, while I worked out upstairs. We just never got there. I would run to pick her up, she would have a bad day, then I wouldn’t go to the gym. I was getting really tired of putting myself on the back burner. And then I spoke to my husband and he said since we pay for after school care…USE IT.

I told my daughter that I am no longer going to run to go get her when I get off work. I need to do something for me. So yesterday I packed my gym bag and brought it to work. I changed clothes at work, and drove directly to the gym. If I go home first, well, I won’t leave. I walked for 20 minutes, and rode the bike for 20. 40 minutes of good exercise! And it felt great!

So last night I go on the computer downstairs and started loading up new songs on my iPod to work out too. I told my daughter I’m going to create a workout playlist on her iPod touch, which holds more songs too. It got my heart pumping and I found I didn’t really want to leave. I have to do this for me.

I have another challenge this weekend…a girl’s retreat. A few of my friends and I like to scrapbook, and one of the gals invited us to her house for the weekend as her hubby is out of town. So about 6 of us are getting together and spending Friday night thru Sunday morning at her place. They have meals planned like lasagna, pizza, cinnamon rolls etc. I hope I didn’t offend the host, but I let her know I was going to bring my own food as I have some things I’m trying to avoid. (Cinnamon rolls? Are you kidding me??? I would love to shove about 3 in my mouth and run and hide, but I have a gut feeling that would make me extremely ill) So I plan to bring my post sleeve items like turkey and cheese rolled up on a low carb tortilla with laughing cow cheese, cottage cheese, yogurt, you know…healthier things.

Don’t get me wrong, I could eat pizza. But should I? Nope. I would love to eat a few slices of lasagna. But I want to try to avoid pastas. The other thing is when we get together we usually drink wine. So I haven’t had any alcohol in months. Do I need alcohol? No, not at all. But I am curious what a sip of wine would taste like. Would I still want it? Would it taste horrible, like coffee does now? So I may have a sip. But I have no plans to drink a lot.

To be honest, all the compliments I am getting are really keeping me on track. So much so that I’m starting to feel a new kind of confidence again. Like I want to do my hair and wear lipstick. That ship had sailed for awhile. Today I had a new client come in and talk to me about an endorsement. Until the end of the year, they are going to be doing all of my hair color and cuts for me. It will save me some $$, but also make me feel pretty again.

I feel like I’m breaking out of my rut. Or my cocoon. I’m emerging into something different. The weight loss center that I had my surgery with advertises with our radio station. I want to approach them about doing an endorsement. Which means I would talk about my experience in their commercials. Full on letting everyone know what I did, and why. I really hope it works out.

Woot Woot!! Weigh in day

I lost 3 more pounds. Which is fabulous since my scale hasn’t been moving much at all. I am  35 pounds down since surgery and today is my 7 week out date. I am wearing jeans today that I haven’t worn in 4-6 years. They are a little tight in the waist, but I’m wearing them!

Things have been better for my digestion since I backed off on protein, and started really doing a good plan of benefiber, mirolax and stool softeners. We have something that is working for me! No more rocks in my stool!

I had a sales person come up to me today and say he was very impressed with how I am doing and he couldn’t believe it was me standing there. I was standing with a side profile and he actually did a double take. So that makes me happy.

On Friday night we decided to go out to eat, and ended up at Denny’s. It was my first time dining out since surgery. I whipped out my card from my dr stating that I had surgery and to please allow me to order off the kids or senior menu. No problem! on the senior menu I found Fit bite omelette that was egg whites, swiss cheese, spinach and mushroom. Served with some fresh fruit and an english muffin. I took a nibble of the muffin, ate not even a 1/4th of the omelette and some fruit. I was stuffed. But happy with how I handled the whole experience.

Today I was running behind leaving the house and didn’t grab lunch on my way out. I figured I could have someone run to Taco John’s and grab me a side of refried beans or something. I ended up ordering from a local place called Fighting Burrito. I created a bare burrito which is in a bowl with no tortilla. I had no rice. So I had chicken, black beans, grilled veggies, a little colby jack cheese, cilantro, lettuce and some salsa. According to their nutrition calculator on the website it is around 350 in calories. And I ate less than a fourth. So I made a smart choice and I’m full once again.

Now I need to kick my butt into exercise gear. It was a tough week with my daughter sick last week, and then I just was pooped over the weekend. I did nothing but read in my comfy chair. It was -20 though so I think it was justified.

But no more excuses. Gotta get moving.

How is everyone else doing?

Do you have support?

I was reading another blog that I love (BariatricforLife) and a comment was made that someone hadn’t told anyone about their weight loss surgery. I get that. At first I was going to keep everything close to my vest and only tell the people that needed to know. But something changed for me as I started reading different blogs about people sharing their stories with complete strangers. And I started getting active on message boards. I questioned why I wanted to keep it to myself. And I changed my mind.

Something clicked for me and I told my family and friends. Then I started talking openly about it with my coworkers. And I took one step further that I never thought I would take…I wrote about it on my station blog. I work for a radio station and I have my own blog.

You can read that blog HERE. I’ve had listeners email me about how they are thinking of surgery too. I’ve had people leaving messages on the station Facebook page asking how my journey is going. And my coworkers have been amazing. When I start to feel like I’m doing all this work and not seeing the scale move etc, someone comes up and tells me I’m looking incredible. Or they are proud of me. I have to remind myself that the scale isn’t the only way to measure my success. I am seeing changes in my body that are huge! But so are other people. And their support has been amazing. My family has been great. My husband and daughter (who is 6) have been so supportive since the beginning. If I even look longingly at something my daughter reminds me of my goals.

My boss has been great too. I felt the need to explain to him some of my recent issues with elimination, to explain why I had to take a day off work because it was making me so ill. He got it. He was very understanding. I’m counting myself lucky. My parents came to stay the week of my surgery to help out. Friends volunteered to help if I needed.

I was at a support group meeting last month and when I sat down a woman looked at me and said ‘I know who you are! I didn’t know you got surgery!’. Last week I was at a nutrition store to get my protein shake and calcium citrate and there was a woman being helped. She was very nervous and sort of whispering to the guy helping her that she was getting surgery in two weeks. I saw what she was purchasing and overheard some of the conversation. Before I knew it I chimed in with an answer to her question about her taste buds changing and the difference between protein shakes. I told her ‘yes, your tastes will change.’ And I told her there is a huge difference in protein shakes and to avoid the ‘fillers’. I told her a little about my journey. Turns out she is going thru the same center I did, and I told her I would see her at group support that Saturday. I didn’t end up going due to my ‘elimination issues’ that had me stuck in the house all last weekend. But I WILL see her again and be there to help her if she needs it.

I have a friend from high school who has been my support online. She went thru it 8 years ago.

So if anyone is reading this and needs support….count me in. I’ll be there as much as I can. It really helps!

In other news, I have had a rough week with a sick little girl. Started with a cough last Friday and I ended up taking her into the dr Tuesday night. We have a lot of bad influenza that caused several children’s deaths here in Des Moines, so I wanted to be safe. Turns out after a chest xray we found she had a form of pneumonia. So I was up several nights in a row monitoring her breathing. She has been out of school the past few days, which has kind of thrown my eating schedule off. So my goal of exercise this week was delayed as well. Hoping to get to the gym tonight!