I was on one of the Bariatric support group websites, and someone had a thread up about relationships. They asked if the weight loss change caused friction in their marriage, or jealousy. And this got me thinking about a relationship that I am having trouble with at my three month mark. It isn’t with my husband though. He has been amazingly supportive. He tells me how proud he is of me, and the changes he sees. My family has been amazing through this journey.

But the relationship that took a hit was one with a friend. A friend who has gone through lap band! We have been friends for years, but I haven’t seen her since my surgery 11/24. She never reached out to ask how I’ve been etc. Occasionally we chat on Facebook, but she makes excuses as to why we can’t get together. She flat out told me she ‘didn’t want to be the fat friend’. It feels like we can’t be friends if I am finally doing well and getting healthy. This is a red flag to me. It feels very one sided. So I’ve distanced myself a little. No, a lot.

I need to surround myself with positive and supportive people. My coworkers have been amazing! I am just disappointed that someone I counted as a close friend, is too jealous to be supportive.

Have you had relationships effected?


2 thoughts on “Relationships

  1. That’s very sad. I will say that the Lapband doesn’t work for many patients so I’m sure she’s frustrated by your success and perhaps her failure with the Band. I’m grateful ever day that I had the resources and frankly the guts to revise from the Band to the Sleeve.


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